Forever a Msytery
As promised dear readers, I said I would write an explain more about life over the past few weeks. Life that has left me with so many emotions, today's post won't begin to unfold them but perhaps in time...
Almost 3 weeks ago, an uncle, on my husband's side, was reported missing and within 24 hours his body was found and our quickly growing fears had become reality. At the age of 62 he had taken his own life, in a way I'm still battling to not visualize most days. It was to say the least a huge shock. Josh and I had no idea that his uncle had actually been quite unwell for sometime and although this was a shock to everybody, for us it came completely out of the blue.
I write this blog, knowing that unfortunately there are few of us left in today's world that have not have to deal with this subject on quite a close and personal level. I unfortunately have had 2 situations leading to suicide in recent months and, this time more than ever it has been a rollercoaster to process. So many emotions roll in when we are faced with such a situation - anger, shock, saddness, frustration and grief...
My intial feeling, after the shock of the news had sunk into my being was anger - anger at so many things - anger at our world, anger at people in general. How can our world still be a place where people feel so helpless, so alone that suicide seems the only possible and sometimes postive step to take? I am aware we cannot make decisions for other people and God's greatest creative gift to us was free will, but how do we still allow people to get so hopeless? I'm sure I am not alone in this thinking, readers.
Next came unbearable saddness, that my uncle had felt so alone, so hopeless that this seemed to be the only option. It still breaks my heart that such situations occur in our world and socitey. Heart-breaking for those of us left behind, who cannot begin to comprehend the thoughts and actions of our loved ones when suicide takes place.
I don't wish to pose an answer today, my mind is still at work on the subject. All I know is this, I have learnt to love my family more every minute, live out my life a little stronger with the hope of Jesus and to remind my kids everyday they are loved, valued and here for a purpose only they can achieve.
Dear readers, there is always hope, when all seems lost, there is HOPE.
Almost 3 weeks ago, an uncle, on my husband's side, was reported missing and within 24 hours his body was found and our quickly growing fears had become reality. At the age of 62 he had taken his own life, in a way I'm still battling to not visualize most days. It was to say the least a huge shock. Josh and I had no idea that his uncle had actually been quite unwell for sometime and although this was a shock to everybody, for us it came completely out of the blue.
I write this blog, knowing that unfortunately there are few of us left in today's world that have not have to deal with this subject on quite a close and personal level. I unfortunately have had 2 situations leading to suicide in recent months and, this time more than ever it has been a rollercoaster to process. So many emotions roll in when we are faced with such a situation - anger, shock, saddness, frustration and grief...
My intial feeling, after the shock of the news had sunk into my being was anger - anger at so many things - anger at our world, anger at people in general. How can our world still be a place where people feel so helpless, so alone that suicide seems the only possible and sometimes postive step to take? I am aware we cannot make decisions for other people and God's greatest creative gift to us was free will, but how do we still allow people to get so hopeless? I'm sure I am not alone in this thinking, readers.
Next came unbearable saddness, that my uncle had felt so alone, so hopeless that this seemed to be the only option. It still breaks my heart that such situations occur in our world and socitey. Heart-breaking for those of us left behind, who cannot begin to comprehend the thoughts and actions of our loved ones when suicide takes place.
I don't wish to pose an answer today, my mind is still at work on the subject. All I know is this, I have learnt to love my family more every minute, live out my life a little stronger with the hope of Jesus and to remind my kids everyday they are loved, valued and here for a purpose only they can achieve.
Dear readers, there is always hope, when all seems lost, there is HOPE.
In loving memory of Uncle Ken
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