To my gorgeous daughter...

My dearest Kezzia,

The other day we sat together in a coffee shop enjoying, as normal for us, the biggest piece of cake we could find. I'd loved hearing about all that had gone on in your day and soon we began to talk about the yumminess of our cake and how too much would make us sick, under your breathe you made the comment "and it would make me fat"...  I must say sweetheart, that Mummy was slightly flabbergasted by your comment. I asked you to say it again , but you shyly refused!

Sweetie, I was a little unprepared for that moment and  I did not want to make it into a bigger deal if it was simply a throw away comment - but you are only 6, so young and your tone made me think there was some true in your worry about getting fat.  At six years old the thought of body appearance and getting fat should not even be on your radar. Yet there we were enjoying our cake whilst you commented, knowing that if you ate to much it would cause you to put on weight and that wasn't good...

Mummy replied by saying that you do so much exercise and dance that you didn't need to worry about enjoying some cake and actually putting on a little weight would probably be a good idea for you. I still see you getting frustrated at leggings falling down when we go on shopping trips because you are so tall  you need age 7 or 8 in length but your small waist called only for an age 5 in size. (Mummy is still not sure that reply was good, bad or indifferent) . Anyway that is not really the point of my writing but rather the fact that the world you are growing up in has become so appearance focused that at 6 years old you are commenting about the worry of being fat... that as young as 6 in the playground you might be talking about your appearance and weight - this thought worries me!

You have been born into a world where  the power of the media and advertisement is huge and it has the power to influence each and every age. Young girls like you are being bombarded with appearance "advice" from before you are really read y to understand or need it. It doesn't take long walking through clothes shops to see that your clothes are being designed in a way to make you look so much older, with designers constantly pushing the boundaries on what is acceptable to wear in public. While you were at school yesterday, I was in a shop yesterday and saw on a model a top that is not ok to wear! Mummy was in shock at the "lack of top" that was on the manikin and the "ok-ness" from other shoppers that it was there. I did giggle at the thought of you ever wearing this top ... Daddy would have the doors of the house locked and you strapped to a chair! I found it hard to think that any mummy would look on their daughter wearing such a top and think, "how beautiful".

Sweetheart , the world you live in teaches girls that their appearance and dress sense is what puts value on them. That is order to be beautiful, popular or worth something means you have to look thin, spot free, wear the most up to date trends and shop in the right shops. Don't believe them!  

You, My  Beautiful Daughter are a precious treasure - a diamond, a gem. As you grow up in this house, as part of our family I want you to know you are beautiful. Your beauty comes not only from how you look but from the very depths of your heart. You are stunning and I hope you never doubt how stunning. But to me, your beauty also shines through every time you help your younger brothers, every time you see someone in need and think of a way to help them. It shines through every time you tell me a story of how you cared for someone in the playground, every time I watch your face come to life as you dance. Every time we snuggle up together on the sofa and just sit, or the times we just want to be silly.
You are beautiful!

I hope that you, my beautiful girl, are part of a new generation that overcomes the power of advertisement and teaches the media about what true beauty really is. That you would live in a way that reflects to others that beauty is not just skin deep. I know that my role in this is huge, and I commit to doing all I can to reveal to you, how beautiful you are but also the true measure of a girl's beauty. I hope too that other mummy's will join us on this quest that seems so huge, that sisters, aunties and grandmothers will come alongside the younger girls in the circle of friends and teach them to.


To me you will always be beautiful and you will always capture my heart.

I love you,
Mummy.


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